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Joke of the Day

"I had sex with a chicken last night. It turns out the chicken came first, after all."

"How Long is a China-man? I always thought he was Korean."

"[tour of zoo] kid: ""i think its a elephant"" me: ""are you giving the tour"" kid: me: ""anyway as i was saying this is the big snake face thing"""

"Yo mamma is so fat when a bus hit her she said who threw the pebble."

"Two flies were on a cornflakes packet. ""Why are we running so fast?"" asked one. ""Because"" said the second ""it says 'tear along the dotted line'!"""

"Why did the pig join a muscle-building class? He thought ""pumping iron"" was a new juice dispenser."

"When you are trying to get out of the aisle at the movies, and you have to pass by people, do you give them the nut or the butt?"

"Business was great last year. I made 6 figures. $2,784.93"

"Why did the male spider spin a web? So he could catch all the fly ladies."

"I need your parent's phone number so I can call you & hang up when they answer. Cause if I'm gonna crush on you, I'm doing it old school."