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Joke of the Day

"From the pilot during his welcome message: ""We are pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry... Unfortunately none of them are on this flight."

"Q: What do you call a blonde sky diving team? A: A new version of the lawn dart's game."

"I'm on the toilet, and I'm pretty sure I just reached enlightenment. Holy shit."

"Why did the toilet make a joke about the balls? It was low hanging fruit."

"I'd imagine the only thing worse then getting your period is not getting your period."

"Two months ago my best friend took off with my wife. And god damnit, I miss him."

"The restaurant scene from When Harry Met Sally, but just me getting a pat down from airport security."

"*bullies advance* STOP! Im a black belt in Shaq Fu! <laughter> *detectives arrive* Jesus, were these heads slam-dunked? Where r the bodies?"

"What do you call Professor X doing a wheelie? Professor + I'm sorry. lol."

"A priest and a rabbi are in a boat they approach a bridge over the river and see a young boy standing there. The priest says to the rabbi ""Should we fuck him?"" The rabbi replies ""Out of what?"""