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Joke of the Day

"Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up."

"So an Irishman.... Walks out of a bar...."

"Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie? He was too far out, man!"

"What are your best/favorite anti-jokes?"

"Black people are human beings."

"Girl: We have a mayor. Do you? Horse: Sure! Girl: What do you call it? Horse: Same as you do. Mare!"

"Are you into gardening stuff like sowing seeds? Well, I'll sew my dick to your forehead so you can seed-EEZ NUTS!"

"What part of a football pitch smells nicest ? The scenter spot !"

"Did you hear about the shortsighted circumciser? He got the sack."

"Remember girls, you can't say happiness... without saying penis"