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Joke of the Day

"Why Did 9Gag Cross The Road? To steal a Reddit User's post on the other side."

"A man seeking to lose some of his excess weight visited the local doctor. John: How can I lose twelve pounds of ugly fat? Doctor: Of course! Cut your head off."

"My girlfriend said she was sick of me pretending to be a detective... ...and that ""we should split up"" ""Good idea"", I said, ""that way we can cover more ground"""

"People are always telling me I look like Hagrid from Harry Potter. I've never seen the movies, but she must be a beautiful gal."

"Did you hear about the gay guy who got in a car accident? Some dick rear-ended him."

"my New Years resolution is to stop making stupid New Years resolutions. I failed."

"Where did the Knights of the Round Table park their horses? In the Sir Lance Lot"

"What hangs at a man's thigh and wants to poke holes that it's often poked before? A key."

"Penguins are scientist by nature... They always have to improve their slides !"

"Why did the scale not wear any of his shirts? Because they all had a tare ^^^I'llseemyselfout"