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Joke of the Day
"Just thinking up snappy comebacks to painful conversations I had 22 years ago. What are YOU doing?"
Next Joke
"I'm so smart, I've got more brains than... Kurt Cobain's ceiling"
"Being an adult is like being a Quentin Tarantino movie: it starts out real cool, there's lots of cursing, it's very confusing, everyone dies"
"Why did Florence Welch sing 'Sweet Nothing'? Because she was out of lemo-nada. It's okay guys, i'll let myself out..."
"What kind of peanuts get warts? Planters."
"What do pink flamingos have on their front lawns? Plastic Italians."
"Famous Russian snooker player Inov the red"
"Dear lord, I thank you for these noodles I am about to eat. Ramen."
"Just got sacked from my job Been working at that jigsaw factory for years I've been in pieces all day :("
"The two things to remember when ur a pothead 1)U lose short term memory 2) Damn! I know there's something else"