123984
Joke of the Day
"Ever ask yourself who, in a perfect world, would raise a child? The answer should be apparent."
Next Joke
"Both my son and daughter love reddit. That must mean it's heredditary."
"You know the world is corrupted.... When people buy the 2015 Macbook."
"Why can't you fool an aborted baby? Because it wasn't born yesterday!"
"So I bought a nihilistic pencil It's pointless."
"1) Put index and thumb together. 2) Place them where nose meets forehead. 3) Close eyes. 4) Sigh. 5) Check to see if person still talking."
"My mother-in-law's coming,,,,, I had to clear out half my closet so she has a place to hang upside down and sleep"
"Crazy ex's are like a box of chocolates They'll kill your dog"
"yeah i got a gym membership. its called life. watch me lift this big ass rock. now im gonna do 20 reps of pretending im a beautiful bird"
"In the Walking Dead how and when does the cop guy find time to clean, iron, and press his uniform during the zombie apocalypse?"