12384

Joke of the Day

"[to other patients in psychiatrist's waiting room] I'm not like you people. This is court mandated."

"Who was the fattest member of Nsync? Joey Fatone"

"Going from Obama to Trump is like going to a nice restaurant but it's full so u leave and have to eat an old ketchup packet from ur car"

"Ayy girl, are you Ohio? Because we should be Dayton."

"At the library: Librarian: you have 45 cents in late fees. Me: (adjusts bow tie then slides 50 cents across the table) Keep the change"

"First time I saw a dry erase board I said thats ""remarkable"""

"What do you call tree porn? Entai."

"I want a woman who can cook, clean, do the laundry, pay the bills & still set aside the time to have sex with me while her husbands at work"

"You're like a prize winning fish. I don't know whether to eat you or mount you."

"Did you hear about the aristocratic horse? He was the last of his race!"