123761

Joke of the Day

"How many kidnapped children does it take to change a lightbulb? I thought 12, but the basements still dark."

"Actually....The quickest way to fix that annoying noise in your car is,,,,,, Just open the door and push her out."

"Why did I go to the dentist at an Indian Reservation? To get some Sioux veneers"

"Horse-drawn carriages are pretty cool but the horses should learn to draw other stuff"

"The president of a popular mail-order business just died. The funeral will be held in 3 - 5 business days."

"I've been hearing noises in the house for a while now and while Twitter was down last night I discovered I have a wife!"

"I'm afraid my pet's going to die soon - he's already 14,000,000 in rock-years"

"Tried to make my coffee with Red Bull today... I made it all the way to work before I realized I had forgotten my truck."

"Girl, if you don't stop touching my crotch,... ...you might feel a small prick."

"Moms that name their daughters Stacy are the real narcissists."