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Joke of the Day

"Girl, if you don't stop touching my crotch,... ...you might feel a small prick."

"I was reading in the paper today... about this dwarf that got pickpocketed. How could anyone stoop so low?"

"If you think you hate me now, wait till I start answering your rhetorical questions."

"Two consonants and a vowel go into a bar..."

"Who decided that the abbreviation for pound should be two letters it doesn't contain?"

"Which of these three does not belong: (A) a lobster, (B) a flounder, or (C) a Korean man who has just been run over by a bus? The answer is (B) a flounder. The other two are crushedAsians."

"A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, ""I slept with a Brazilian...."" The blonde replies, ""Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?!"""

"Why should Trump be careful of deporting Mexicans? It could go south so fast."

"After every one of Benedict Cumberbatch's lines in DR. STRANGE, turn to your neighbor & say ""I guess that's why they call him Dr. Strange"""

"yes ladies i have a black belt. its a black leather belt from Marshalls. [i flinch as a bird flys by] you girls wanna get some lunch?"