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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a pig that has never been tested for an infection? Uncultured swine."

"The substance was mildly acidic on the pH scale It was a solid 5/7"

"A Levels Despite my A Level results being A B B A, it still seems no employer will Take a Chance On Me."

"Me on New Year's Day: 2016 is so going to be my year! (Morgan Freeman narration): 2016 would not, in fact, be anyone's year."

"FRIEND: Don is flying in tomorrow ME: My cousin Don or Amazing Hearing Don? [I get a text] Amazing Hearing Don"

"Threesome? No thanks If I wanted to disappoint two people in the same room, I would have dinner with my parents."

"[Racist] How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb None.They just beat the room for being black."

"What did the clown say after having a few drinks? ""I'm feeling funny"""

"A major financial scam kingpin walks into a bar... Then he greases the palms of all lawyers & ensures he gets away without a big penalty."

"A man who calls himself ""Dog the Bounty Hunter"" is currently hunting down a man named ""War Machine"". We all live inside a comic book now."