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Joke of the Day

"And in the news today, Justin Bieber has yet to be shot in a drive by. . ."

"How does Hasbro test tickle me elmo's? They have test-tickles."

"My friend told me this hilarious joke about Parkinson's last night But I don't want to tell it because I'm a little shaky on the details."

"What discovery was the garden's mathematician excited about? AVOCADO'S NUMBER!"

"I love the queen in chess... I always mate with her."

"If you have twin girls and don't dress them like in ""The Shining"" and make them stand in hallways, you've squandered a precious gift."

"It is possible to chew and swallow $80 of shrooms in the length of time it takes the cop to walk from his car to yours."

"There's Gold in them teeth! - Prospector in a rap studio"

"What is a black belt's favorite beverage? Kara-tea."

"At some point during texting, a text is sent that means: ""This is the end of the conversation. I'm gonna do something interesting now."""