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Joke of the Day

"Cat knocks over coffee Me.... Cat.... Me... Cat.... Me: well? Cat.... Me.... Cat: (Russian accent) I admit to nothing. Jumps down"

"What's brown and sticky? A poop."

"Never date a tennis player Love means nothing to them"

"Why did a Mexican man throw his wife off a cliff? Tequila."

"The good news is that there is baseball in heaven... The bad news is that you're pitching on Friday."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Alda ! Alda who ? Alda time you knew who it was !"

"All human females should be exterminated at menopause to reduce bitchiness? amiright?"

"Good news! I've been given a goldfish for my birthday . . .the bad news is that I don't get the bowl until my next birthday!"

"Why do hitman always wear gloves? because theyre always wacking guys off...."

"Day 2 of being Kidnapped. Kidnappers have now committed suicide."