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Joke of the Day

"New lesbian species of dinosaur discovered. Lickalottapus."

"The doctors all doubted me. They all thought I couldn't do it. They said I couldn't fight them all at once and well, they were 100% right"

"The United States has fallen into disrepair, due to a great catastrophe... ...they say it was called: ""The 2016 Presidential Election Season"""

"How is soy and dildos similar? They're both meat substitutes"

"I asked my friend why i have a thing for short Asian girls. he said ""its because you want them to call you Godzilla in bed"""

"What is a long room with many doors called? I'm not sure, I hallways forget"

"Sometimes I think Scientology was secretly started by Mormons so they could have a religion to make fun of."

"Is that a sweet potato in your pants, or are you just oddly shaped?"

"*Goes fishing *Catches Spongebob *Hangs him on my wall as a trophy *Too lazy to buy a sponge *Uses Spongebob to clean toilet"

"How do you keep an Idiot occupied? [Click here to find out]( http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/1v1wqm/how_do_you_keep_an_idiot_occupied/)"