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Joke of the Day

"Babies who cry in a restaurant would rather be eating in a breastaurant."

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"What did the carrot say when the last vegetable arrived at the party? TURNIP"
"Why don't you ever see elephants hiding up in trees? Because they're really good at it."
"Why did the redneck take his cat to Walmart after running over it's tail with the lawn mower? Because they're the largest re-tail-er"
"What's the safest font? Helmetica."
"My in-laws are visiting... This is their homicide note."
"Got a call saying my son got caught lying, cheating & was being expelled. I don't have a son. That kid is one damn good liar"
"A man with a marine biology fetish comes back from vacation. His friends greet him with a warm whale cum."
"There are 10 types of people in the world - those who know binary and those who other people talk to in the bar :-)"
"If a bundle of sticks with an axe in it is a fasces, does that make an OP with an axe to grind a fascist? Seems that way on 4chan."