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Joke of the Day

"Everybody loves pussies... Except the dong lovers. *dog :P"

"What do you call parents who teach abstinence only? Grandma and grandpa."

"why is everyone posting about 9/11? It's still 2 months away."

"5-year-old: Dad! Dad! My sister- Me: Stop tattling. I don't want to hear about it unless there's blood. 5: Me: 5: How much blood?"

"I used to see people alone at restaurants and feel bad for them. Now I'm with a screaming two year old wondering, ""Who is that solo genius?"""

"Last night an Afghan put a jacket on me. He said ""You da bomb!"""

"My bank is really proud of me. They keep calling to tell me I have an outstanding balance."

"- Are you even listening to me? - Of course I am - Ok, what did I just ask you? - If I'm listening to you"

"What did the fish say when it ran into the wall? DAM! (airplane stewardess told me and had me on ground laughing)"

"Why don't monkeys gamble in the jungle? There are too many cheetahs."