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Joke of the Day

"Did you know that camels can last longer without water than sex? They can go three weeks without water, but can't go a day without a hump."

"America thought about using fat as a currency... ...but there was too much inflation."

"[Swims out to Sea] *sees shark* OH NO! *dolphins save me* Thanks dolphins! *dolphins ask for a tip [I'm broke] *they return me to the shark*"

"Fleetwood Mac Money has gone missing from Fleetwood Mac's dressing room again. They're starting to suspect Stevie Nicks."

"My friends won't get margaritas with me anymore because I get drunk & start saying everything is ""mexillent""."

"I may not be Dairy Queen, baby, but I'll treat you right!"

"My girlfriend is like ketchup. I always bang her on the table."

"Accordion to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments often goes undetected."

"My niece was born with no eyelids, bless her heart, but the doctors were able to replace them with surgically removed foreskin... Only side effect is she's a little cock-eyed now."

"Pregnancy- The number 1 cause of arranged marriages"