122140

Joke of the Day

"My 12 yr. old girl is having a sleepover tonight. She told me, ""DO NOT EMBARRASS ME!"" I'm considering twerking to Ace of Base later."

"Sometimes I put my cat in the sunroom hoping the coyote who lives out back will charge at it and bounce off the glass."

"Someone asked me if I'd ever taken ecstasy I said, ""No, but I've given it a few times."""

"Why do Asian parents never have a white baby? Cause two Wongs don't make a white"

"Two cows and a cat were going on a trip. Cow A: Do we go this way with the cat? Cow B: The cattle go this way, we shall go the udder way."

"Why do elephants have four feet? Because six inches would never satisfy a female elephant."

"Pete and Repete walk into a bar... Pete and Repete walk into a bar, Pete walks out. Who is left?"

"How does Albus get into Hogwarts? Through the Dumble-door"

"What do witches eat at Halloween ? Spooketti halloweenies devils food cake and booberry pie !"

"Why couldn't the incontinent man print his documents? He couldn't Ctrl+P"