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Joke of the Day

"There used to be an ad campaign that said ""go to work on an egg""... I tried that, the egg wouldn't move and eventually it cracked, so I went to work on a bicycle as I usually do."

Next Joke
 
"Why did Burger King decide to partner with Dairy Queen instead of McDonalds??? Because she unwrapped his Whopper. I'm so sorry!!!"
"Just changed my Facebook name to 'No one' So when I see stupid posts I can click like and it will say 'No one likes this'"
"How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Juan"
"My wife said she was divorcing me because I am obsessed with masturbation. I told her to go fuck herself"
"What can you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him on a drag! What do you call said dog? Doesn't matter... he's not coming anyway."
"Freak out your neighbors by removing one member of their stick figure decal family each night."
"I don't know why I even bother having an iPhone anymore. It spends so much time on charge, you might as well call it a landline."
"What happened why the grape was squished? It let out a little wine Eh....eh..eh"
"Public speaking is a lot like being on a topless beach. It's only hard for the first few minutes."