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Joke of the Day

"What profession does it take to screw in a light bulb? Driver"

"I am allergic to fire Everytime I touch it I get burned"

"THERAPIST: Ever had a job? ME: I once worked at a zoo T: Great! & what did you take from that? ME: Definitely not a penguin T: What M: What"

"What would happen if black widow spiders were as big as horses? If one bit you, you could ride it to the hospital."

"I tried telling him to stop eating Canadian provinces But he's having Nunavut"

"*Mom makes me take out the garbage* *Garbage and I begin to date* *I start taking things too fast* *Garbage dumps me*"

"What is the difference between a cat and a comma? A cat has claws at the end of it's paws, a comma is a pause at the end of a clause."

"How do epileptics greet people? They shake."

"How did the Italian die? Talking while driving."

"What's the definition of a great farmer? He's outstanding in his field."