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Joke of the Day

"That stupid guy I have stupid friends gotta admit.But i have a stupid one. Yesterday he asked me did anybody die and survive??!?!?!??"

"Her: *smiles* You fill those out very nicely. Me: (looks at jeans)Thanks. Bank Teller: Sir, could you please pass back the forms? Me: Ohh!"

"What do you call a psychiatric patient who is afraid of doors? Unhinged"

"the chipotle guy who never charges me extra for guacamole even though there's a big G on the foil. what are we?"

"If mankind has learned one thing from human history, I'd be stunned."

"Old friend: I barely recognize you. ""That's the look I was going for. """

"What's your favorite rape joke? Here's mine: ______________________________"

"What is the cow's holiday greeting? Mooooory Christmas!"

"Why does it suck to be a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven."

"Amazon Prime is probably the least threatening of all the Transformers."