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Joke of the Day

"How many Buckeye football players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But he gets three hours credit."

"what do you call a sad ditch? a depression."

"Who's the laziest doctor at the hospital? ''Doctor Dolittle.'' EDIT: The doctor off that movie that talks to the animals."

"I've always said that life is a lot like doing laundry There's a lot less bleeding if you separate the colors from the whites."

"My most pretentious joke. Knock knock. Who's there? To. To who? To whom."

"replace the chair in the Oval Office w/slightly bigger chair every day for next 4 yrs til trump looks tiny + his feet don't touch the ground"

"Why couldn't the grape help his friend move on Saturday? because he was in a jam"

"Magnus Carlsen is so hot... I'd give him the d4 if you know what I mean."

"Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the expected?"

"My wife and I were discussing people owning weird animals... and she said, ""I've always wanted to get a manatee."" I said, ""That's very kind of you. I will take it with two sugars."""