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Joke of the Day

"I can't get hard unless I can hear a gluten intolerant person weeping over a menu."

"What do you call a bunch of white guys and a one black man Court"

"I'm gonna be celebrating MLK the only way I know how... By napping, because you can't have a dream if you aint sleeping."

"TIL that French military units do not fly the French flag. They use a white flag instead."

"Right before I left the house my wife asked me if I filled out my organ donor information and now I'm hesitant to start the car."

"What do you call a black man who dies of heat exhaustion and a white guy that dies of a brain aneurysm? Different Strokes"

"Filling out my Census form. I have to list every person who lives in my home for a majority of the time. What's your mother's name, again?"

"Will we just know how to play the harp in heaven, or do we need to arrange lessons beforehand?"

"Do you piss in the toilet before getting in the shower? I'll bet you wipe yourself with toilet paper too..."

"Teacher to student: ""Make a sentence using the word ""I"" Student: ""I is.."" Teacher: ""No that is not correct, you should say I am"" Student: ""Ok. I am the ninth letter in the Alphabet""!"