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Joke of the Day
"So apparently yesterday was middle child day... Nobody noticed"
Next Joke
"What did the cannibal get when he was late to dinner? The cold shoulder"
"What country always follows Zimbabwe? Zimbab-Bee!"
"""If he told you to jump off a bridge would you do it?"" ""No, because i'm not fucking crazy mom."""
"[reading online survey] Are you ready to double your satisfaction? My god this sounds wildly inappropriate. *clicks yes*"
"Introducing 2017's newest best seller: A Million Little Fibers. Written by Melania Trump."
"What is a feminist's feeling when she gets ""threatened?"" Womenaced"
"I just returned from a concert put on by the Bermuda Philharmonic Orchestra... ... ... Half way through, the guy on the triangle disappeared."
"Playing Oregon Trail. You meet a man on the Oregon Trail. He tells you his name is Terry. You laugh and tell him, ""That's a girl's name!"" Terry shoots you. You have died of dissin' Terry."
"My ex is having a really hard time moving on From what I can tell through his blinds, he is currently eating (something we always did)."