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Joke of the Day

"*takes earrings out* *takes bracelet off* *slips out of shoes* *tears off jeans, shirt, bra* *shaves head* Ok Doc you can weigh me now"

"Baby, did you sit on my F5 key? Cuz dat ass is refreshing."

"Sometimes I tell my And I laugh at them."

"Who invented King Arthur's round table ? Sir Circumference !"

"A few days ago I wanted to share a sandwich with a homeless person... ...but then he told me to fuck of and that I should buy my own sandwich."

"You can tell a lot about a person by their avi. For instance if they use an egg, they're probably a chicken."

"Did you hear about the guy who invented a knife that can cut four loaves of bread at once? He's calling it the ""Four Loaf Cleaver."""

"What do you name a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter. He won't come."

"What sound does a fratboy make when he hits the water? DOUCHE"

"A priest asks a rabbi, ""when are you going to finally try pork?"" The rabbi replies, ""At your wedding friend,"""