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Joke of the Day

"A man had sex with a baby horse [nsfw] He was clearly into pedo-filly-a"

"Baby on board* Oh really? Thanks for letting me know, I was about to ram into your car, but now I won't."

"Her: We have rats! Me: We do? Her: Look something gnawed thru this package of cookies! Me: (wipes crumbs from my mouth) I'll buy traps."

"What did 1 volcano say to another volcano? That ash."

"What did the Metis people think of the look on Stephen Harper's face when he lost the election? They though it was Riel funny!"

"I didn't like this marimba player very much... ...He just had bad vibes."

"If ignorance is bliss then explain Facebook."

"Went to the gym and asked the trainer. Could you help me do splits? Trainer: Sure How flexible are you? Me: I can only do Thursday."

"Did you hear about the missing dalmatian? It's been spotted."

"Tomorrow is a day of fasting and abstinence for many denominations. So I guess that means no meat of ANY kind."