120001

Joke of the Day

"Pinocchio in love So Pinocchio says to his father: 'Dad I'm in love!', his dad replies 'That's great, now you want me to carve you some penis?' 'No, better drill me a hole at the back' @_@"

"Who could it be? there's a big idiot between the ""I"" and the ""Y"" on the keyboard. Why don't you go and see who it is?"

"If you can't find the source of a quote, attribute it to Kurt Vonnegut, Einstein, Dorothy Parker, or H. L. Mencken and move on."

"They say nobody likes Nickelback... ... but there's **gotta be somebody.**"

"Jesus Christ! I forgot to buy dog food last night and now my dogs are playing a Sarah McLachlan album and googling humane society."

"Why did the Chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide"

"What do you call a man who thinks women are easy to lie to? Deceased"

"Have you heard of the Austrian man Duerf? He was the world's leading reverse psychologist"

"Excuses are like assholes... Fuck 'em"

"Be careful of black ice. I rode my bike over some black ice once. I slipped and fell off, and when I looked up, my bike was gone."