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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Michael Jackson and pimples? Pimples will wait till you're 14 to come on you're face."

"Why does someone who runs marathons make a good student? Because education pays off in the long run!"

"So I've been hearing a lot about this Baader-Meinhof phenomenon recently [baader-meinhof phenomenon](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baader-Meinhof_phenomenon#Frequency_illusion)"

"A guy calls 911 Guy: *calls 911* Hello? I need your help! 911: Alright, What is it? Guy: Two girls are fighting over me! 911: So what's your emergency? Guy: The ugly one is winning."

"Turns out the guy I tipped is NOT the men's room attendant & now I really just want to get this BJ over with."

"it's not abuse if the substance likes it."

"What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil? I've never paid to see a lentil."

"Why didn't the shrimp share his treasure? He was a little shellfish."

"Did you hear what happened to the computer programmer? His wife told him, ""while you are out, buy some eggs."" He never came back."

"Why can't you fool the aborted baby? It wasn't born yesterday."