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Joke of the Day

"Nine months from now we'll have an adorable, pooping reminder of The Night the Internet Wasn't Working."

"What's a jew doing on a swing? Fucking with the german snipers"

"What's another term for anal bleaching? Changing your ring tone."

"My girlfriend is in the hospital after she ate a giant bacon cheese burger. It was mine."

"What do you call a deceptive feline? A lion. Get it guys lol? Lion ~ Lying I'll pounce myself out now..."

"9 out of 10 people agree... Gangbangs are AWESOME!"

"What's really important to a bat when they are looking for a new home? Echo-location, location, location (Replace ""bat"" with ""zubat"" if you wish.)"

"[gets exhausted after having sex for five minutes] ""Go on without me"""

"You can literally take anything from anyone as long as you shout ""police emergency"" and run away"

"i dropped a chicken mcnugget and I've been on the floor of mcdonalds sobbing the lyrics to how to save a life by the fray for 2 hours"