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Joke of the Day

"A man was dissatisfied with a Chad Kroeger album he bought off of the 95% rack... So he returned it and got his Nickelback"

"A photon checks into a hotel and is asked ""do you have any luggage, Sir?"" The photon replies ""no, I'm travelling light"""

"Will I ever be a good parent? *shakes baby* Wait a minute, if you're here [cut to Magic 8-Ball in crib]"

"What did the heatsink say to the CPU? ""I'm a huge fan!"""

"A waiter walks up to a table of older Jewish folks... A waiter walks up to a table of older Jewish folks while they are eating and asks: ""Is ANYTHING alright?"""

"Business Idea: 1. Join dating site. 2. Arrange dates with 30 people at your house, all at the same time. 3. TIMESHARE PRESENTATION."

"What's the difference between a pedophile and acne? Acne waits for puberty to cum on your face"

"Sometimes I stand in the shower for 10 minutes before I remember what I'm supposed to be doing. So, yes your secrets are safe with me."

"The absolutely wrongest answer when you ask a woman if the carpet matches the drapes ""Nope. Hardwood floors."""

"I had sex with your mom A sandwich"