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Joke of the Day

"What does the Italian cat say? Cheow!"

"My scale is broken. It only seems to go up."

"When I see guys with skinny jeans and skin tight T's on I pretend they are actual giants who woke up tiny and just had nothing else to wear."

"John was hard at work with the broom in his family's tent. His mother came in and said 'That's nice. Are you sweeping out the tent?' 'No' John answered. 'I'm sweeping out the dirt.'"

"I'm getting a new appreciation for black and white films... I just watched jungle fever and I loved it!!!"

"Some people call me a horse... and to those people I say neigh."

"Googled 'how to start a fire' got 10000 matches"

"Turkey shoots down Russian jet it's too soon to tell, but insiders report his actions were in hopes of receiving a presidential pardon before thanksgiving hits."

"So, in light of CISA becoming a law, I give you this joke about governments trampling people's rights: [Deleted by NSA]"

"Hi, famous people getting DUIs. You know you can probably afford a driver, right? Just a thought."