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Joke of the Day

"Friends are like boobs, some are big, some are small, some are real and some are fake."

"Why can't I pay pay your mom for sex with my credit card? Because there's a minimum charge of 5 dollars."

"I scream, you scream, we all scream... The ice cream man kidnapped us; please send help."

"Whats the difference between Mashed Potatoes and Pea Soup? Anyone can mash potatoes!"

"Why do people who drink milk struggle to walk? Because they lactose."

"Did you hear that the BBC have sacked Bob the Builder? They feel they can no longer trust a children's TV star who claims to be able to 'fix it'"

"Maybe there is no baby I'm starting to suspect my wife's been stuffing her shirt with an increasingly large series of hams Now I'm hungry."

"What's the difference between /r/funny and /r/jokes? /r/jokes is funny and /r/funny is a joke!"

"My wife and I agreed to only smoke after sex. I've had the same pack of cigarettes for 6 months... She's up to 2 packs a day."

"A Roman walks into a bar He holds two fingers up to the barman and says ""five beers please"""