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Joke of the Day

"What is a snowman's favorite book ? War and Frozen Peas !"

"I hate those people who knock on your door... And tell you that you need to be saved or you'll burn... Stupid firemen."

"Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels."

"When playing tug of war with a 2yo, it's best to remember they're pulling really really hard and holy shit they travel fast when you let go"

"Have you heard about the old wheel that got a new image? He retired."

"How do pigs gets to hospital? In a hambulance"

"How long is a battleship. True or false? Wong! How long is a China man."

"I lost a very dear friend and drinking buddy in a tragic accident this weekend. He got his finger caught in a wedding band."

"A knock sounds at a nerd's door... *Knock knock!* ""Who's there?"" ""You know!"" ""You know who?"" ""Exactly. AVADA KEDAVRA!!!!!"""

"I like my coffee like I like my women. Cock full o' nuts."