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Joke of the Day

"The first woman on the Moon... ""Houston, we have a problem."" ""What?"" ""Never mind."" ""What's the problem?"" ""Nothing."" ""Please tell us?"" ""You know what the problem is."""

"I've been waiting all year to post this this"

"I was at a cafe when a Frenchman spilled water on himself. It was a pretty l'eau point in his life. (L'eau is French for water)"

"""Have you heard about the new pirate movie?"" ""It's rated aaarrrrrrrr."""

"A guy walks into a bar. A guy walks into a bar with a block of asphalt under his arm, he says to the bartender ""I'll have two beers, one for me and one for the road"""

"I'm so tired, I just typed a tweet into my GPS. It responded with directions to my day job."

"What kind of car does Jesus drive? A Christler. Oh no. Wait.. He drove a Honda. But he didn't like talking about it. John 12:49 : > For I did not speak of my own Accord."

"""Mom! I'm going out!"" - You're not leaving this house until you change that miniskirt - Why not? - Because I can see your balls, Richard."

"Two baby seals walk into a club..."

"What do you get when you cross a sheep with a robot? Steel wool"