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Joke of the Day

"Who died and left the US in charge? Hitler."

"Two fleas where running across the top of a cereal packet ? ""Why are we running so fast ?"" said one Because it says ""Tear along the dotted line"""

"Lust. Love. Marriage. LUST: Tearing her panties off. LOVE: Sliding them down, gently. MARRIAGE: Folding them regularly."

"I really can't believe the price some women pay for sunglasses. I'm starting to think it'd be cheaper to get the kitchen window tinted."

"Being a gentleman never goes out of style."

"How many ADD kids does it take to change a lightbulb? Wanna go ride bikes? (xpost r/imgoingtohellforthis)"

"What's the last thing that goes through a bug's mind when it hits your windshield? It's ass"

"""Commissioner, we've found 20 kilograms of cocaine."" ""10 kilograms you say?"" ""Yeah, 5 kilograms"""

"What would you get if you crossed a skunk with a type of Easter candy? Smelly beans!"

"When Chinese audiences see movies based on toys... ...they probably think ""Hey look! It's those toys we made!"""