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Joke of the Day

"Harassment. So a teacher asks her students to use the word harassment in a sentence. A boy stood up and said, ""Ok this is easy. I met a beautiful girl one day and harassment a lot to me"""

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Callas ! Callas who ? Callas should be removed by a podiatrist !"

"It's impossible to have an *ok* time on a trampoline. It's either the most fun you've ever had or you go to the hospital."

"What's the difference between an Irish wake and an Irish wedding? One less drunk."

"A teacher challenged 10 of her students to come with a pun each, the whole class would get no homework if one of them made her laugh. But no pun in 10 did."

"""Susan, will you marry me?"" ""Oh yes Johnny, yes! Yes!"" Ten grand later and it's still the best prank I ever pulled on my twin brother."

"[laying in bed] wife: Did you remember to find a stud before you hung the TV up? me: Yes *sound of TV crashing to the floor* me: No"

"How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just beat the room for being black. *drops mic, gets beat by security*"

"Butter Sometimes when I am baking I mix I can't believe it's not butter and butter, so that way I have I kinda believe that some of this might be butter."

"I have a deeply religious Muslim friend who knows the Qu'ran back to front Which is the way that the Koran is written. A surprisingly well informed joke about Islam (with apologies to Jimmy Carr)."