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Joke of the Day

"Not everyone that comes into your life needs to stay there."

"I'm a grammar nazi. I'm also a regular nazi, but that's a different story."

"What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese."

"I don't know anything about golf... ...but I just watched it on TV for a couple minutes. It looks really easy. I'm sure I could get a very high score."

"There's a name for people without beards Women"

"Women never find it devilishly charming when I follow them into the lady's room. Thanks a lot, ""Top Gun""."

"I can't tell if Michael Cera is actually an actor, or just an awkward guy who keeps wandering onto film sets and does his best to fit in."

"At bedtime I read my daughter a few of my favorite RTs, tuck her in & whisper, ""This is why we don't talk to strangers on the internet."""

"What did the cannibal say to his victim before they went for a long walk? You're gonna be pooped after this."

"My friends keep telling me to stop impersonating butter. But I can't. I'm on a roll now"