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Joke of the Day

"My wife has really dry skin so I asked my doctor what I could do about it. He said, ""Give her a milk bath."" I said, ""Pasteurized?"" The doctor replied, ""No, just up to her knees will do."""

"I Work At Sears And Some Black Guys Came In Asking For Polyester Pants It's weird because they usually pick cotton."

"Babysitting is a way for teenagers to feel like adults while adults go out to feel like teenagers."

"Apple is coming out with a product for Asians.. The iOpener.."

"""I'm calling you because you're easy."" ""You're not even very good."" ""You're just the best I can do this late."" Dominos: ""Your order, Sir?"""

"Do you know whats black on the bottom and white on top? Society"

"What does a dyslexic agnostic wonder about? Is there a dog?"

"What do you call an explosion in a Frencg kitchen? Linoleum Blown-apart."

"Man.. These croutons are the best thing since dried bread!"

"If simply wrinkling my nose at your smell is politer than spraying you head to foot with Febreze then so be it. Not happy but so be it."