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Joke of the Day
"My sex life is like Coca-Cola; first it was normal, then light and now zero."
Next Joke
 
"Tell her she's glowing and watch her do the mental math on when her last period was"
"What did the cork say to the bottle? If you don't behave yourself, I'll plug you."
"I like the way baseball players pick up each other's bats after they cross home plate. More sports courtesy, please."
"Why are there no knock knock jokes about America? Because freedom rings."
"what do you call a jewish pokemon trainer Ash"
"Teacher Why did the teacher get glasses? Because she was having trouble with her pupils"
"What's the fastest branch of the military? The Marines. When they retire, they're corvettes."
"Why did a girl leave his boyfriend for a mushroom? because he wasn't a fungi!"
"[Reality TV] HOST: Welcome to America's Next Top Psychic! Please, try not to-- *One contestant stands up*: I WON! H: --ruin it."