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Joke of the Day

"What do you call an atheist who no longer worships the Flying Spaghetti Monster? A-pasta-ate."

"I don't want to be racist.... so stop trying to make me to take up competitive running!"

"What's the difference between a girl's track team and a bunch of pigs? One's a group of cunning runts... Source: Imgur user YossarianMinderbinder"

"When you have the opportunity to become a bigger person, take it because cake is delicious."

"I know a trick to make my dick 2 meters long... ... I fold it in half."

"Why did the cat join the Red Cross ? It wanted to be a first aid kit."

"20 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Cash, no Hope and no Jobs. Please don't let Kevin Bacon die."

"People talk about the environment like the Earth's in danger. Don't worry about Earth. Earth was a ball of magma once. Worry about us."

"Guy: If u won lotto, what'd u get? Me: A cat sitter G: To take extra good care of Sox? M: *pictures a cat in a suit taking care of me* Yes"

"Why did cavemen drag their women around by the hair and not the feet? Because if they drug them by the feet the would have filled with dirt."