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Joke of the Day

"I worry a $15 min wage will hurt the long-term viability of my small business where I sell expired milk to people I went to high school with"

Next Joke
 
"What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs? A condescending con descending (duh dun dun chh)"
"I just found out that the reptile I had sex with last night had an STD Now I have a dino-sore"
"Just explained the Higgs Boson to my friend even tho I don't understand it. He was very convinced. I bet this is how religions get started."
"Psychic said I should learn to take criticism better & always consider both sides of an issue, so I gave her the back of my palm to read."
"Why did Hitler kill himself? He got the gas bill."
"I should've been a sniper. They get to lie around all day and hardly lift a finger."
"So a black guy and an asian guy walk into a classroom... The black guy gets a D- while the asian guy gets a B The asian guy gets beat up by the black guy lol"
"Teacher - if my cup is half full, what does that mean? Student - that you need a smaller bra!"
"I ran into my ex the other day, hit reverse, and ran into him again."