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Joke of the Day

"One of the hardest parts of being a parent is discovering your 6 year old is better than you at every video game ever."

"How many monkeys does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Monkeys screw in trees."

"Have you ever heard of the mexican train killer? He had loco motives"

"How do you become really unpopular on Reddit? Tell someone they reposted."

"TIL Doctors have successfully grafted eye lids on a patient using foreskin. The surgery went well, but now she's a little cock eyed."

"How often does an oriental farmer milk his cows? Dairy"

"What were the photocopier's last words? Good night, sweet prints..."

"No LinkedIn, I do not want to display my Twitter on my profile. I would actually like to keep my chances of getting a job above zero."

"Pretty sure the neighbors are impressed with the banging and screaming they heard. Little do they know it was just me chasing a spider."

"People used to be much smaller. WWII people were a foot shorter. Medieval people were basically hobbits. Jesus was the size of a cat."