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Joke of the Day

"*strips naked* ""Magic mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?"" Cops: he knows we can see him from this side, right?"

"Why didn't the racist eat the middle of his sunny-side up egg? Because he only likes whites."

"Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection, except one. He's never gonna give you up."

"A kid looks up from his phone... ...."

"How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? ....give her a shovel"

"At the grocery store. Customer: ""Are these GMO carrots?"" Worker: ""No, why do you ask?"" Carrot: ""Yeah, why do you ask?"""

"You might think a man's anatomy is quite similar to a woman's.... But there's a vas deferens."

"A vulture carrying two dead raccoons tries to board an airplane... and the flight attendant says, ""I'm sorry, sir. You're only allowed one carrion."""

"The oldest written recipe is for beer. Even when most people couldn't read or write, they knew they had to mark that shit down somehow."

"Did you here about the gay midget? He finally came out of the cabinet"