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Joke of the Day

"I went to the doctor's office for an Alzheimer's test... I can't remember the results."

"If it's important to you, you will find a way to make it happen. If it's not, you will find an excuse."

"The Lady Artist by Andrew Pictures"

"What do you call a doctor for websites? A URLologist"

"Sunny today but its not sunday (its Saturday). Really gets you thinking."

"I've just bought a car that parks itself. Oh really? And where it is? I have no fucking idea."

"*wakes up from surgery How did it go? Surgeon: Good, your nose only lit up twice"

"My friend asked me, ""What is a palindrome?"" I said, ""No, it's not."""

"Game of Thrones is exciting, but I think it's important to remember that these people are fighting over a chair"

"How many Amish people does it take to change a lightbulb? A what?"