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Joke of the Day
"You think your life is bad? I've got that ""Five dollar foot long"" song stuck in my head."
Next Joke
"What's brown and rhymes with Snoop Dogg? Dr. Dre"
"Interviewer: What drives you? Me: The bus mostly Interviewer: I mean what motivates you to get out of bed in the morning? M: missing the bus"
"When carrying a sleeping child to bed in the dark, make sure all intervening doors are open. Babies make cranky, ineffective battering rams."
"[giant fork knocks at my door] ""Excuse me sir do you have any spoons?"" [a family of spoons are cowering in my kitchen drawer] ""um...no sir?"""
"A pirate walks into a brothel and says... ""ARG! THERE SHE BLOWS!"" Edit: Wow 8 views. thanks guys :D"
"Ok, don't let them know you're a puma Interviewer: We're very impressed! You've got the job! ""REALLY!?! I'M SO HAPPY I JUST PUMA PANTS"""
"I like my coffee like I like my slaves. Free. You racist!"
"Never end a sentence with a preposition For example: The boy had no one to play a preposition. Wait... I think I gave two examples above."
"Did you hear about the comedian that calls himself ""The Sofa King""? He's sofa king funny."