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Joke of the Day
"What kind of pants does Mario wear? Denim denim denim..."
Next Joke
"Alcohol is never the answer, unless the question is being at a party and feeling socially awkward."
"I don't understand why people say ""Oh it's just walking distance away"" Everything is walking distance if you have the time."
"I've got a new job in a biscuit factory. So far I've made a packet."
"sick of bullshit dui checkpoint profiling just because i'm a white male with the jagermeister logo emblazoned across his truck windshield"
"What's that Lassie? Bark! Yes I have a few moments of free time Bark! Goddammit lassie no I don't want to hear about Jesus"
"Don't give the homeless money. They'll just use it on sharpies and cardboard."
"When I die, just throw the laundry in my grave with me. I want to die exactly as I lived."
"I just changed a light bulb with a beer in my hand if anyone needs a man for something."
"Forget drugs and sex. Parents please talk to your kids about their grammar and spelling."