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Joke of the Day

"MOM: Any plans tonight? ME: Me and the guys heading out to find us some ladees *shoots finger guns HER: So Pokemon Go with Gary? M: Yessss"

"I applied to Hogwarts the a few weeks back. Unfortunately, I didn't get accepted. Figured I could just Slytherin."

"Little Johnny The teacher came up to Johnny's desk and asked can you tell me what separates you from a monkey. Johnny said with confidence ""the desk""."

"My wife left a note on the fridge that said ""This isn't working I'm going to my mom's"" I opened up the fridge. The light was on and the beer was cold. I'm not sure what she was talking about."

"The Philadelphia eagles Punchline in title."

"What's the difference between an ""Ooh"" and an ""Aah""? About 5 inches."

"Did you hear about the Indian who drank 4 gallons of tea? They found him dead the next day in his tea pee."

"how many Mexicans... How many Mexicans does it take to... Oh shit, they're already done."

"I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. I lost my case."

"I hate my new hair cut. Hopefully it will grow on me."