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Joke of the Day
"Man, that's a cold joke... but, Icee what you did there."
Next Joke
"Today is Friday the 13th. Try not to be a teenage girl in her underwear at night at a deserted summer camp today."
"Hello, police, I have a burglar trapped in my home gym. Please hurry. The longer he's in there the more powerful he'll become."
"""Adorkable,"" I say nervously, looking into the bathroom mirror. ""Adorkable. Adorkable."" A fire erupts behind me. Zooey Deschanel emerges."
"What do you call a docks nanny? An Au'Peir"
"Flavor Flav turns 51 today. He'll spend a quiet day at home, still resting up after a weekend of moving clocks forward."
"Just heard this one at the pub: What do you call a monkey with a suicide vest? Ba***boom!*** ^(Don't worry, I kicked him out the door.)"
"What do you call it when a golfer misses the hole? Fore-play"
"[Bar] ""What'll you have"" Scotch ""You want it neat"" No thanks *bartender throws some crumbs and hair in my whisky* Thanks"
"Why is Abraham Lincoln on the Penny? Because it makes cents (sense)."