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Joke of the Day

"So a man comes in a bar Er, no, wait, I meant a horse. So a man comes in a horse..."

"In America, someone is shot every 15 seconds. How is that person still alive?"

"Dumb number jokes: What did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt."

"I was going to do a Liam Neeson joke, but I feel like the best ones have already been taken."

"Why aren't kids under the age of 18 allowed to watch videos about duck calls without the consent of a parent? Because they contain a lot of fowl language."

"Where do people with Ebola go when they die? Bloody hell"

"God: You finish all 11 commandments? Moses: About the 11th one... God: What? Moses: Check yourself before you wreck yourself? God: Fine, 10."

"My high school bully still takes my lunch money... On the plus side, he makes really good subway sandwiches"

"I'm only 19 and my eyesight is constantly getting worse. When do I get Adult Supervision?"

"Ancient Chinese proverb say man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day"