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Joke of the Day
"What's the best way to keep water from running? Don't pay the water bill."
Next Joke
"My daughter does this thing where she copies EVERYTHING the dog does; Bark, beg, fetch etc. It was adorable! Until the dog humped the couch"
"Farts are the air to my throne."
"What do you call a girl who likes men with small d**ks? Your girlfriend!"
"Why do the hamburgers beat the hot dogs at every sport they play? Because hot dogs are the wurst!"
"Saw a TV at the dumpster with a sign that said 'free TV' and boy do I feel stupid, I paid $200 for the last TV sitting at a dumpster"
"Yesterday I had to buy a new hoover. My old one was just gathering dust."
"A skeleton walks into a bar and asks for a beer and a mop."
"What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4 year-old child? Eric Clapton never would have let his bag of coke fall out of a 49th-story window!"
"[robbery in progress in the store I'm at] *quickly remembers training from karate school* *bows to robber* *is kicked in head so hard*"