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Joke of the Day

"Ladies ... I will solve the argument of the proper skirt length for you. The proper length is at least 2 inches below your cellulite"

"When someone says ""The last thing I'd want to do is hurt you"", I'm wondering why they have a list of things to do that includes hurting me."

"I told my boss that I'm quitting my job to become a comedian. He said, ""You can't be serious."" I said, ""I know."""

"I'm surprised more black people don't relate with NASCAR... After all, there are no rights"

"She puts the hot in psychotic"

"What's the difference between a lobster with breast implants and a dirty bus stop? One is a busty crustacean, the other is a crusty bus station."

"A kid asked his father why he was giving the weird name Potedad. The dad said it was an anagram."

"She might be Satan, but if I'm going to hell, I want to be sleeping with the boss."

"Two toilets were fighting one day when the first toilet said to the second toilet ""Put up your dooks""."

"I'm well pissed off with my neighbour today. Yesterday he kept playing the same Lionel Richie song over and over at full blast. I wouldn't mind normally, but it was all night long."